Right new year new me, not fresh start or anything like that. Completely revamping me and ella are going to make a new Gweendoweetos channel (it will have a new name as well), i have gave up gymnastics but will be carring on as a coach. And this year i have decided i will beat trichotillomania even if it means taping my fingers together and getting weird looks its worth it. I have made a huge list of things i need or want to do this year which includes passing my exams and HOPEFULLY getting a boyfreind but who knows what the future holds. Right now i am happy i now have great friends (old & new) and i couldnt have asked for better. I am actually supprised on how far ive come not just in this last year but throught my life if im honest i think ive done amazingly ive dealt with a tonne of hurt and pain, sure there are people out there suffering far worse than i did and i dont give them sympathy for the reason they dont want it instead i give them respect becasue if i had to face what they do everyday of their lives i would have cracked at day 1. I know ive gone off course again, im pretty bad for that sorry :Dxxx

well i hope you all had a great christmas and new year and hope you live your life the happiest you can and take the little things for granted remember “what you do in life may be insegnififcant (can’t spell) but its important that you do it”

love love love ya gemma xxxxxxx

This post is just a huge rant and anyway no one even reads my blog so I don’t see the point. Everyone who suffers trich gets help from somewhere and their friends stay and support them. Why am I finding it harder? One of my friends told me today basically it’s all in my head and I’m saying I have trich for attention. No I’m not there was a reason I told everyone I was born without eyebrows and this is it. Because she isn’t the center of attention anymore it’s time to push me down, why is it now that the split between my (so called) friends seems worse? Why is it once I told 3 of them, they are being unsupportive? I’m scared to tell the other side of the group now in case they have the same reaction. U already hardly talk to them thanks to the girl who said trich was all in my head. I hate when you find people like that unsupportive and unsympathetic when it comes to you but you have to show the whole package for them. Like this year hasn’t been bad enough. My dad is going in for an operation on his ankle and there is a 40% chance it could go wrong, my brother took a seriouse asthma attack and I found out I have trich. Please let something good happen cause I know I want to win the lottery.
Well thank you for reading my rant I just had to get this out and I appreciate you wasting some of your time on me.
Love love love Gemma Xxx

Hey guys today was my doctors appointment and I just wanted to tell you how I got on. Well to begin with my doctor hadn’t even heard of Trichotillomania and I had to spell it out for him, tell him what it is, what causes it and how to treat it. That shows how rare this disorder is, a doctor had never heard of it. He told me he won’t put antidepressants but set me up to see a psychiatrist which may to 2 months or maybe even more. After my appointment my mum phoned to see how it went. She doesn’t want me to go see the psychiatrist as she is afraid it may affect my insurance matters in the future, but who needs insurance right if I’m going to have life insurance it’s not going to help me when I’m dead. But I don’t know what to do should I listen to my mum and deal with trich the rest of my life or should I get this problem sorted and see a psychiatrist? I don’t know, please give me ideas on what you think. Also you may have noticed I took the friend post down that is because when I told my friends about this they looked at me as if I was a freak and never took it seriously asking stupid things like “is it contagious?” that is not what I need coming from the people who are meant to be my friends. So to end this post: yes I have trichotillomania, I am clueless on should I listen to my mum or go see the psychiatrist and I am friendless. I’m getting off to a good start with this.

I love Jack Wills, but one thing i don’t really like is the price. How am i meant to save my money and shop in jack wills, it just isnt possible. I really am choosing random things to bolg about now who knows maybe tomorrow it could be chicken (and now i want chicken). Actually a random fact about chickens= there are more chickens in the world than people. Bet you didnt know that and if you did touche. Anyway back to Jack Wills, im one of those people that will see the logo on celebs and go “oh my god they’re wearing JACK WILLS!!!!!!!!!”. Don’t ask me why because im still trying to find out the answer. So five hoodies, 1 stolen shirt ( it got stolen off me i didnt steal it) a bag, lipgloss and a card wallet thingymagig i still want more jack wills things. And this brings me to how outrageous jack wills are. they have their own line of condoms, yep thats right condoms and it costs £3 just for one. they come in eaither a little flap thing or a box and you can get them in hot pink and striped and anything you can think of lol. I know this because me and my best friend bought 2 for her gay best friend as a christmas joke, though they are still sitting in her room as she forgot to give them to him and her mum has nearly found them twice (whoopsies). I olso just realised that i have gone on more about chickens than jack wills in this post (ahh well). anyway if tou want to see what jack wills stuff is like and they’re expensive prices, google jack wills and you shall find it.

love love love ya gemma<3